Like many people, I have a background that led me to make wrong choices and choices that were born out of a need to be loved and wanted. I am adopted. I am the product of a teenager mother and her choices. As an adult, I came to the realization that my parents adopted me as a “fix” for their failing marriage. All the anger, resentment and loathing that they felt towards each other, was going to be erased when the adopted me, or so they thought.
They already had the child they wanted, the boy, chosen when they were in love. He became their symbol for all that was right, a way for them to verify their choice to marry and stay married. If there was ever two people that were not meant to be together it was them. The irony, I was the one that would point that out to them.
I grew up, ignored, abused at will and treated like a servant. While the boy grew up and remained a constant child of reckless abandon, I grew up the perfect child, dedicated to her parents, hardworking, scholastic and quiet. I was forbidden to join any school social clubs, and later to work in any job other than babysitting while all my friends worked in co-op jobs and learned about life. My sole purpose was to be like a maid, to be my mother’s companion and to study as it was my job to prosper so that she could leave my father and live with me. Growing up I knew that I was different from all of them. I knew that my voice was strong and true, but I had been taught to not trust myself, to ignore my needs and to repeat the patterns.
As an adult, after many years of pain and suffering I learned to listen to my inner voice and break the patterns. The lessons I learned, are the lessons I pass on to others. You do have a strong voice, and you do have the power to break negative patterns. I learned that the choices other people make don’t have to be yours, even if they try to decide for you.
Sometimes making choices that speak to your heart and soul ends up hurting the people you love. Sometimes, the choices that you make, means the people that you love won’t agree with them, and they will walk away from you. Choices are not always easy, and the pain they can create is always very real.
What does all of this mean? It means, instead of berating ourselves for the choices we make, we should learn from them, grow. Whether they were good, bad, or somewhere in between, they were the choices that had to be made, and we made them with all the knowledge and understand we had at that time.
Take the knowledge that you have now. Take everything that you have learned and if you find yourself stuck in a pattern of negative beliefs and hating your life, then do something about it. Make a choice for you, listen to your inner voice and follow your dreams.
Let Your Spirit Grow.com
Some people happily admit to it, others deny ever doing so, but at some point or another almost everyone has done it. What is it? Why it’s the secret delight of creating a negative daydream about someone who has “wronged” you in some way. For many people it can be fun and diverting to image ways to “get back” at the object of their anger or frustration.
Maybe it was the Barista who got you order wrong on Monday morning when all you wanted was your hot coffee fast. Maybe it was a friend who borrowed money and hasn’t paid it back. Maybe, it was a family member whom you argued with but didn’t resolve the issue and you still seethe with anger. In all these examples and more, many people will often turn to negative daydreaming in order to exact an imaginary revenge, but what are the Spiritual ramifications of this practice?
Negativity is not just a word, it is a state of being, an energy that you carry with you and put forth to the world. By allowing yourself to access that negative energy and fostering it through adverse daydreaming, you strengthen that energy. You teach yourself that it is okay to imagine harming another person. You teach yourself that communication is not a valid means of resolving an issue. You teach yourself that bottling up emotions like anger and frustration is acceptable and “normal” for you. If you have children, you teach them the same messages.
Sometimes it is not possible to communicate directly with the source of your anger or frustration. It is possible however, to remove the negative energy you have created in and around yourself by working on and resolving the basis for your feelings. If you find yourself upset with a slow Barista, for example, and you want to know why it bothers you so much, you can begin by looking at the patterns in your life where you have found yourself angry. Perhaps you will discover that there were many times where your anger was immediate and disproportionate to the situation. That is generally an indicator of a deeper root source of pain for a person. You don’t have to suffer or be alone in your pain. You can choose to work with a qualified professional to seek out and resolve your issues. Then you can have positive daydreams instead.
Let Your Spirit Grow.com
At first glance, many senior citizens appear to be at a point in their lives where they are able to devote more time for themselves. This can be a false view as in today’s world, many grandparents have found themselves saddled with the responsibility of either babysitting several days a week or in fact raising their grandchildren. This can create a situation where mind, body and spirit are often pushed to their limits.
Even when a senior is not faced with that particular challenge there are often others such as health issues, pain, medication side effects, loneliness, low self-esteem and bereavement issues.
Hypnotherapy is a tool, which can be used alone or in conjunction with other modalities, services and/or medications. It can be used help seniors achieve a state of deep relaxation, while allowing them to be receptive to positive messages of change and healing. It doesn’t require any invasive measures or special equipment be used. It also does not require a large time commitment out of a person’s day, as a Hypnotherapy session lasts one hour. Positive changes from Hypnotherapy can be achieved in as little as one session, but in general, multiple sessions are required in order to facilitate lasting change.
One issue that plagues the senior population, is that many seniors often inadvertently find themselves interacting with others less and less. Isolation from society is an ongoing problem for seniors. It can be due to ill health, financial constraints, location, self-esteem issues or motivational issues. One way that Hypnotherapy can help with this issue is by helping to create a positive mindset, which allows for the ability to see new possibilities and explore opportunities that would not have been considered before. This can open many avenues of change. For example, a formerly reclusive senior may find himself or herself motivated to join a special interest club or a seniors fitness group to improve their health, therefore reducing their isolation and expanding their social circle.
If you are a senior citizen, who is struggling, and you want to make positive changes in your life but you don’t know where to start, consider Hypnotherapy.
Let Your Spirit Grow.com
If you are not happy with the direction that your life is taking then you have to determine if you wish to change your life. No one else is responsible for changing your life. You cannot sit back and expect it to be better if you do not make the effort.
1. DETERMINE THE CHANGE YOU WISH TO MAKE. Sit down and figure out what it is that is not working for you in your life at the present moment. Do you have a vision in your head of what you would like? Do you have a desire for weight loss? Do you wish to purchase a home? Do you hate your job and want a better one? Get a piece of paper, and write down everything that you love and hate about your current situation. List all of the pros and cons. Having the information on paper where you are able to see it written out is very helpful in clarifying and setting a goal.
2. LAY OUT A PLAN FOR CHANGE. Now that you have determined your goal, you need to figure out what is your plan of action to achieve it? Write out the steps that you need to take in order to achieve your goal. If you need to research information then take the time to do that. If you need the assistance of experts then allow yourself to contact the appropriate person/s. Take whatever steps you need in order to clarify your plan.
3. MAKE MINI GOALS. The best way to work towards accomplishing your end goal is to create mini goals along the way. By using this method, your end goal will be perceived to be less overwhelming. For example, if you wish to change jobs and you have determined in STEP 2 that you are missing some qualifications, then set a mini goal of taking one course or training that you need. After you have completed that requirement, you can then set another goal of the next training that you need.
4. ACCESS YOUR GOAL. As you work towards your goal, stop at various points to determine if you are still happy with the path that you are taking. It is possible to blindly go forward and then realize too late that end goal has changed. Take time to re-evaluate your choices and see how you feel. If your goal changes that is okay. Repeat STEPS 1-3 and begin again.
5. REWARD YOURSELF. Congratulations you have reached your goal! Reward yourself in some small way for your accomplishment. Remind yourself of all of your hard work and be proud of what you have done. Breaking old habits and patterns is difficult, but you did it.
Let Your Spirit Grow.com
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Jade is a certified Hypnotherapist, Reiki Master, Spiritual Coach, Intuitive Tarot Reader and EFT Practitioner. LetYourSpiritGrow.com has evolved from offering alternative healing services to becoming an information resource for those who are open to thinking outside the box