It’s probably easier for some people to live in a world of black and white, of absolutes, where no allowance is made for variances; where some people are grouped into one category, and hardly if ever are they allowed to be seen in another light. Sometimes it’s given a name, that name is discrimination.
Discrimination against minorities or religions are two well known examples. Discrimination against women is often talked about along with an unseen “glass ceiling” that many women in the corporate world especially still speak of. A “glass ceiling” is an invisible limit put on some women who work in the corporate field, where they are restricted from achieving a higher status in their career. It is generally agreed upon that discrimination is wrong and should not be tolerated, and yet, we as a society are shifting towards a discrimination that is widely accepted, and is used for the basis of humour which is in poor taste. This discrimination can be found in stand-up comedy to commercial products geared toward this view. What is this discrimination that is allowed to flourish today, and even often encouraged? It is discrimination against men.
I know dear reader, you have heard the slurs. How all men are evil or dogs or players. How they can’t be trusted and how they should just be used for their money and not valued as a person. I have personally heard countless women say the most offensive things about men and laugh. I have often confronted women in defense of men, and been met with distain and quizzical looks, as my standing up for men in general was not acceptable. Have you seen the knife holder that is in the shape of a man? Each knife that fits into it impales the male figure. One site called it the “all men are bastards” knife block. I just don’t think that is funny. If the tables were reversed and the product was in the shape of a woman being impaled by knives, the public outcry would have have no doubt resulted in the product no longer being manufactured, but since it’s a guy being stabbed, that’s okay. Right??
Look, not all men are devils, and not all women are angels. The sexual gender of a person does not speak for what kind of person they are. Just as skin colour, height, weight or profession does not speak for who a person is. I don’t think enough women even begin to think about how hard it is for men in this world. Men are judged all the time; for their looks, the amount of money in their bank account, their sexual prowess and for their social skills. How they are never supposed to be shy or intimidated to talk to a woman.
There are so many women that lament that men never ask them out, or that they always have terrible dates. Sometimes they talk about this guy that they know who they want to date but he never does ask her out. Sometimes, they talk about how some guy at an event was looking at her but he never made any moves. Hey ladies! Have you ever asked a man out? Have you ever walked across a crowded room to ask a man if he would like a drink? How about ever asking a man to dance? Try to imagine for a second how scary that must be? To find the nerve to put yourself out there knowing that you might get shot down in 2 seconds by a woman who thinks that all men are scum and how dare you talk to her?! How many men have gone through that humiliating experience and begin to question even wanting to date! Who needs that constant rejection all the time? Who wants to put themselves out there all the time and constantly encountering women who question their manhood, their intentions, quiz them about their social status or financial status?
While I am on the topic of dating, I want to say that yes, dear reader in case you are wondering, when I was dating, I did ask men out. When I went to a club, I did ask a man to dance or did offer to buy him a drink. When I went on dates, I never expected a man to pay for me every time. I always offered to pay for myself. Sometimes the man would insist on paying, and sometimes we split the bill. When I was dating my husband, we worked out a back and forth paying system, where he would pay one time, and I the next.
Okay but what about the players you ask? What about them? Yes male players exist, but so do women players. If you don’t want to be with a player ladies, then use your common sense and intuition to guide you, and stick to your predetermined set of life rules you have created for yourself regarding what you will and will not accept in your life. If you don’t have any interest in being with a player and you know for a fact that he is a player, then don’t talk to him, and don’t date him! Don’t feed into his flattery or games, just walk away. If you are unhappy with a player, but refuse to break up with him, then don’t turn around and say that all men are evil. There are so many nice, decent and good men, that are overlooked and ignored, but if all you respond to are men who treat you badly, then YOU are the problem.
How does he treat you? How does she treat you? That is the question that needs to be asked. Forget about making generalizations about people. Forget about lumping men into the evil category and women into the angels who are perfect and make no mistakes and gee, where is my knight to save me and cater to me! Ugh!! I am soooo sick of the princess mentality that some women have. You are dealing with a PERSON. If you don’t like that person then move on but don’t lump them into a category of hate and loathing and discrimination.
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Jade is a certified Hypnotherapist, Reiki Master, Spiritual Coach, Intuitive Tarot Reader and EFT Practitioner.