This is a contributed post.
All the private jokes that the two of you shared, the bunches of flowers, the date nights, and love - everything; they’re all gone now, and you don’t know how to function anymore. You’re scared about what the future holds, you’re sad about what you’ve lost, and no matter how hard you try you can’t seem to get rid of that awful feeling in the pit of your stomach. It’s a like a bad dream that you can’t wake up from, no matter how hard you try to. You just wish, more than anything else in the world that things could go back to how they were before - when your life made sense.
Coping with a breakup isn’t easy, it’s totally and completely heartbreaking. Right now it might feel as if you’ll never be happy again, but there is light at the end of the tunnel - that’s a promise. It will take time for you to heal and get back to being happy again, but with time, you will get there. Here are some things that you can do to help yourself heal and get back to feeling like yourself again.
Give yourself time
Breaking up with someone or being broken up with warrants grief. When a relationship ends, it’s natural to grieve what you’ve lost, so don’t worry about feeling okay right away. It’s perfectly fine to take some time to grieve your loss - cry, scream, do whatever you have to, to make yourself feel better again.
While it’s perfectly fine to let your emotions flow and do a lot of crying, it’s not okay to let your grief overwhelm you. Right now it might seem like the end of the world, but in time, as the wound heals you will start to feel better and will smile and laugh again.
Focus on feeling good
One of the best ways to start feeling happy again after a breakup is to focus on feeling good about yourself. Once you’ve passed the only-eating-ice-cream stage, focus on eating healthy foods and exercising on a regular basis. By focusing on yourself, you will feel happier and more in control of the situation, because you're not letting your grief overwhelm you.
Studies have shown that after breakups, a lot of women lose their confidence, so it’s important to find ways to get it back. A great way to do so is to treat yourself to some new pieces of clothing, such as some new going out clothes, a new designer bag, or some new fancy Vanilla nightwear. It’s amazing how much more confident updating your wardrobe can make you feel after a breakup.
Getting your hair done or treating yourself to a makeover could also be another way to give your self-esteem the boost it needs. It's funny how much happier a new hairstyle can make you.
Stop blaming yourself
Don’t dwell on what went wrong and what you could have done differently. Blaming yourself for the breakup will only make things worse. No matter what caused your relationship to break down, you need to realise that you’re not to blame, or at least, you're not the only one to blame - remember, it takes two.
You can wallow in self-pity and blame yourself all you like, but it won’t change anything. Your relationship is over - as much as it hurts to hear that, it’s true. You need to try to move on so that you can start to get your life back on track.
Break ups are hard; there’s no doubt about that. It can take time to heal and get back to feeling happy again. Hopefully, the tips and advice above will help to make recovering from a breakup that little bit easier for you.