When your partner does not care to find their inner bliss, what should you do? Keep reading to learn more. In general, It is often easier to explore your spirituality when you are single. When a person is single their time is their own. It seldom matters how much of your free time is taken for meditation, yoga classes, or retreats. Single people also have the freedom to decorate in any style they desire, and that includes objects which speak to their spiritual soul, like a Buddha figure or gemstones.
The single life is wonderful for many people. There is nothing wrong with being single and loving it, if that is the direction you have chosen for your life. For those who are not single though, negotiating time and energy for spiritual discovery can be a difficult thing, especially when your partner has no interest in finding or changing their own spiritual path. What should you do? Do you force your partner to learn with you? Do you give them gifts of books on what you are studying? Respect It is very important that you do not try to force your personal views and beliefs onto you partner. Do not berate them for their choices, or act superior because you have decided to explore a new avenue of belief and learning. Do not add spiritual objects to your home with a total disregard of your partners personal space. Your partner is on their own path, just as you are, and both of you have to focus on your own individual journeys. For most couples, this will be a difficult time. The transition in thinking, the emotions, and the excitement of learning can be overwhelming for the partner who is, for lack of a better term “left behind.” Find Balance The method for dealing with this period, is to work on finding balance. For the person who is exploring their spiritual path and the person who is not. If you learn something new that you want to share with your partner, do it lovingly and gently without forcing your beliefs onto them. Don't Do This You have just taken a class on Chakras. You are excited and want to share all that you have learned with your partner. In your excitement you buy a collection of gemstones which relate to the Chakras. You insist on giving your partner “their” stone. This is a gemstone that you have picked for them. You are certain it is theirs because you are convinced a certain Chakra point in them needs to be "fixed." You then thrust this stone into their hand, and insist that they have this “problem”. Without giving them a chance to speak you then describe in detail to them all of their “issues”. You then order them to carry the gemstone with them at all times. Do This Instead You have just taken a class on Chakras. You are excited and want to share all that you have learned with your partner. In your excitement you buy a collection of gemstones which relate to the Chakras. You really want to share what you have learned with your partner, but you recognize that they may not be receptive to what you have just learned. You love your partner very much and although you want to share your new knowledge right away, you decide to find a beautiful bowl to display your new gemstones in instead. By doing this, you know that your partner will see them at some point. You also know that if they are interested, they will ask you about them. If that happens, you will briefly explain what they are for, and will only elaborate IF and WHEN they ask. You also decide to leave your books from the class on your coffee table, so that you or anyone else can read them too. You know that just like water flowing down a river, it is best to let people find their own way, at their own pace. Feeling Left Out What about the partner on the receiving end of all this spiritual enlightenment? They may feel that they have a partner they do not recognize. They may begin to feel left out, alone or no longer compatible. One thing a partner can do is to try and offer support during this time of exploration. They should not make light of their partners choices. Work together to create a space that works for both of you through communication and compromise. Two people who are committed to each other can be on different paths, and sometimes those paths can overlap. Experience different views, share new discoveries with each other at a leisurely pace, and continue to be there for your partners as you journey together.
0 Comments
Learn how self hypnosis can free you from your self set limitations. Read more in this heartfelt post. When I was a little girl, I used to dream that someone would rescue me from my life. I never thought of myself as a princess. I was certainly never raised like one or taught to act like one, but I still wanted to be saved by someone. No Knight To Rescue Me As the years went by, no one came to save me. I waited like I was supposed to, but I saw no brave knights. Where was he? I wondered why I had no flowers, no gentlemanly kisses to my hand, and no offers of courting. In my heart, I knew that I was a good person, I prided myself on not being like the negative people around me. Every day I saw by example those who seemed to enjoy seeing people suffer. I consoled myself that I certainly didn’t get any joy out of anyone’s suffering, so therefore, I was sure to be rescued soon! While I continued to wait, there was constant negativity directed at me. It made me doubt myself and my actions more and more. I was building bricks for my tower without even realizing it. Soon I had built so many bricks for my tower, that it was almost blocking out all the light around me. I began only paying attention to the darkness. That darkness fed my fears, ignorance of life, false beliefs, and poor self esteem. One day I had enough. I decided that sitting in a tower was pretty darn boring! I wanted to learn things! I wanted to live my life! I wanted to have my own voice! I looked around my tower and I realized that even though the negative people in my life had helped me build the bricks, it was me who had built my tower. No one had put me in that enclosed space but myself. So I looked around my tower, and I decided that things needed to change, because my prince wasn’t coming, this wasn’t Camelot, and I was no Guinevere! Bring A Positive Voice I had no idea where I was going to start or how, so I just started with something I already knew how to do. I know how to talk to myself. It sounds strange but so many people do it. The difference now was that I would only talk to myself with positive messages. Any time I heard myself saying something negative out loud or in my head, I would correct myself, and change the message to a positive one. I forced myself to get out there and be social. When I met someone new, previously I would have told myself that the person "wasn’t interested in what I had to say". With the “new” me, I forced myself to say: “This will be fun. It’s exciting to meet new people. I wonder what interesting conversations we will have?” At first it was incredibly hard for me to even think positive thoughts! I struggled to maintain control and not panic when I spoke to new people. Often I would pretend that I was excited to meet someone new, but inside I was shaking with insecurity. Eventually, forcing myself to do it over and over again, I began to realize that it wasn’t an act anymore. I really did enjoy meeting new people and having interesting conversations. Once I could get out of living in my own thoughts all the time, I started to observe body language and mannerisms, and I saw that other people were nervous too! I was not alone after all. Self Hypnosis I didn’t know it at the time, but I learned years later what I was doing is a form of Self Hypnosis. Self Hypnosis is something that most people do all day long, but unfortunately, many people give themselves negative messages. Negative self talk only causes a reinforcement of negative patterns in the brain. What does that mean? It means that if all you see, hear and speak is negative, then you will unconsciously look for negative in every situation. You will attract, and feel negative all the time. With that one action of continued positive self-talk, I had kicked out some the bricks in my tower to let more light in. By doing that, I was able to see that there was hope in my life, so I kept encouraging myself to try new things. I went to social events that I never would have gone to before. I forced myself to talk to people, sometimes people I knew, mostly people I didn’t know. Sometimes that didn’t go very well, because I ended up talking to people who were stuck in their own negative patterns, but I kept trying. The braver I got, the stronger I felt. I volunteered in hospitals so that I would be forced to interact with people. One volunteer position was in a hospital gift store so I could learn new skills without the pressure of worrying about being fired if I messed up! Let The Light In Everyone has their own path in life, and only YOU get to decide how you will view it. If you only see the rocks you stumble on, or the animals that try to bite you, you will miss some incredible aspects of your journey along the way. If you hold fear in your heart, and build up your tower so you never move forward, never feel the touch of another; never move on from past negative experiences, you will have deprived yourself of a full life and an amazing journey. As the years have gone by and my life has gone up and down, with a variety of negatives and positives. Everyone is a work in progress as no one is perfect; no one is without fault. Today my tower has some bricks left. They are pretty strong and resistant to breaking, but that is okay. I am working on them, and loving myself, knowing the light can reach me now. Learn how to incorporate a 5 minute meditation into any part of your day to improve your spiritual health. Do you know that you can meditate in 5 minutes? It's true. When many people think of meditation, they usually imagine it as a difficult and complex process which requires a blank mind, a totally quiet space and some ethereal music playing. Others imagine a retreat in a stunning natural setting with exquisite meals and enlightened teachers. Anyone could find peace and enlightenment in that setting couldn’t they? It's experience that not many of us ever have the opportunity to experience. Parents are familiar with an early morning “Mommy/Daddy wake up!” If this is your crack of dawn wakeup call, It's pretty hard to feel peaceful. It's not exactly the tranquil sounds of nature is it? What if your day starts with an early morning gym session before you go to work where you barely have time to eat lunch? What if you work night shifts, and your day starts when everyone else seems to be finishing? Welcome to the reality of modern spirituality. Peaceful moments are few and far between. How can a person possibly hope to work on themselves if they barely have a break? Take 5 Minutes A Day For Yourself Whenever and wherever it can happen, take five minutes to do something for yourself. The thought of taking time for yourself is a difficult concept to many people. Many people feel that they have to "do it all", but doing it all for everyone else, leaves precious little time for the most important person of all~ you. Do Something You Love Do what you love for a full five minutes. Read, dance, sing, or make a cup of something your enjoy drinking and have it while it's still hot! For those five glorious minutes you are going to be only thinking about your needs. Breathe deeply and enjoy. Engage all of your senses as you do. Notice the smell and taste of your drink, or the sensation of your body moving as your dance. Listen to the sound of the music filling you room, or enjoy the crisp feel of the pages of your book. Let go of guilt during this time. What you are doing is contributing to your positive mental health, which in turn feeds your soul. When you allow yourself to be fully and completely in the moment, without interruption, you connect with yourself again. Welcome to five minute meditation! Didn’t it feel great? The point of taking five minutes for yourself is a baby step towards being able to connect with yourself and find the inner peace you need to keep going with the daily slog, because let's be real, some days are a real challenge! Fully enjoy your five minutes and then continue on with your day. When you need to, you can then tap into those good feelings that you allowed yourself to feel. Creating a feeling of positive energy is a big step towards mind-body-spirit healing and a great beginning step in any spiritual journey. When anger is a predominant emotion in your life, your efforts for spiritual growth can be harmed. Read more in this enlightening post. It seems to oppose the basic tenants of spirituality teaching. How can anger be of any benefit for anyone trying to follow a spiritual path? Spirituality is not about being perfect, or never feeling any emotions. Emotions are what allow us to connect to our fellow humans and all the creatures around us. Embracing our anger and looking at its root cause encourages us to embrace all parts of ourselves and let go of the negative energy associated with unexamined, idle anger, which only muddies up our spiritual path. What is idle anger and why should it matter? Imagine a car that is running but just sitting there not moving. Is it serving any useful purpose or benefitting anyone in any way? As it sits there, it is wasting gas and causing noise and smoke pollution. Idle anger is like that car, just sitting there, not contributing in any positive way to a persons well being. It causes its own form of pollution and noise in the body and mind of the person it is idling in. It is hard to find your spiritual path when you cannot see the road in front of you for the smoke, or even hear your inner voice to think straight. Many people categorize anger as a “thing” which must be controlled and segregated away, but by doing that, a person then will consider a part of themselves to be “bad” and not worthy of being included in their whole being. A very effective method to try to discover the basis for your anger is to practice Journaling. Journaling is simply the act of writing out what is felt about a specific incident as a person feels it, and continuing to write whatever comes to mind. An example of this could be anger at being cut off in traffic while driving. Once the incident is written out and can be view and read aloud, it often becomes clear that memories and other feelings are somehow connected to that anger. With continued writing, incidents and feelings not even related to the driving incident emerge. A pattern begins to be form, which can then be viewed more clearly, and the various emotions and memories associated within it worked on. It is at this time very beneficial to include the use of one or more alternative healing modalities in order to dissipate the disruptive emotions associated with the memories involved. EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques), Hypnotherapy and Spiritual Coaching can help. Every memory is therefore still maintained, but it no longer holds a negative charge to it. Once the basis for an ongoing anger is resolved, people often find that day-to-day life becomes easier for them. They are not so quick to become angry with others, and when they do feel angry they are able to feel the emotion, as they should but not let it take over their whole being. Acceptance of the emotion and letting go of it, allows them to continue on in their day and not hold onto that negative energy long term. Their car is no longer idling, and the road is clear ahead of them. |